Thinking ahead

So many times we say "I wonder how I'll act in that situation". In my nursing career we sometimes get callas and think families or a pt. do not really understand the grave situation they are in or that their family members are in, and we think they should just give in and let nature take it course. I have learned there is no such thing. Nature doesn't have a course, just like a sudden rain storm makes new paths down a hill, so does every personal crisis follow its own path.

Bevan has always had two or more lives. The limited one with family that he would only let some of us in when it was convenient to him and his other life, that of art, friends, social needs, social appearance, acceptance of others, not family, and that of being very self absorbed and the last, that of making sure nothing of the church got mixed in, for others to see, at least. Well those two worlds are colliding and he has no control over it.

When we visited with him for a few min. on Monday he was very tired and couldn’t talk much, we were just leaving as a friend and her husband came to visit, he wanted them to stay and us to leave, (which we were already doing), but he didn’t want the two groups together. He also couldn’t tell us enough about the California Paul who would come at any time and stay for any length of time, with just a phone call, but we all know that the real Paul in his life is our Paul who has more than done for Bevan, and I only hope at some point he will thank him, as Paul should be thanked.

I am grateful for my one life, which includes God, Family, Friends, and Responsibilities for others, Compassion, Service and Love of those around me. That all those things can come together and make me who I am. I just always hope that I can show love and gratitude to those who touch my life